The last two years, I've joked "may your days be harried and bright." Sometimes Christmas can feel that way. In the song I shared last week, the lyrics Why so scared that you'll mess it up? When perfection keeps you haunted, all we need is your best, my love. That's all anyone ever wanted jumped out at me. We've made some changes, some tough decisions and taken a step back from some things, and I was very worried about other's opinions, very scared I would mess it up. So I've let some things go, and it has felt almost like I was letting out the breath I'd been holding just to prove that I could.
There have been things this Christmas that have gone undone. Advent Calendars, Christmas baking, card delivering, some books to read and some movies to watch have all been absent. There have been no handmade gifts this year, and I'm surprised at how okay with it I am. I'm breathing it away, reminding myself that my children won't remember not having them- they would remember a mom who lost her mind because we didn't. I know that years from now, gifts will be sitting in the pile to take to Goodwill, and my boys aren't old enough to miss the things we've decided to skip.
I hope they'll remember family time together, brother shopping at the dollar store, making s'moreos on the stove, and paper snowflakes hanging from the ceiling. There are enough things to worry about. I have decided that for me, a perfect Christmas won't be one of them.
And that, in a way, makes it perfect.
Merry Christmas from the Telford Home.
May your days be Merry and Bright, and imperfect, too. Give yourself that gift this Christmastime.